Social anxiety = your brain running a constant judgment-check loop during every interaction. Chapter 7 shows how to rewire from self-monitoring to curiosity.
The story
Social anxiety isn’t only “I’m shy.” It is your brain running a constant background process called:
`while[talking] { check_for_judgment[]; }`
Result: every interaction feels like an exam, networking feels like an audition, and you walk away replaying the “awkward moments” reel.
Problem: The self-judgment lens
When your attention is locked on “How am *I* coming across?” you get:
– Spotlight effect thinking
– Over-monitoring every word and gesture
– Chasing approval instead of noticing what is actually happening
You are not broken; your system is just tuned for threat, not connection.
Solution: Practical Empathy + Self‑Acceptance
In Chapter 7 of *A Practical EmPath: Rewire Your Mind*, Scott walks through a different loop:
1. Notice your own signals
Pause and name what you feel, then link it to a value.
“I’m anxious because I care about respect and belonging.”
Now the feeling is data, not a flaw.
2. Shift from self‑focus to other‑focus
Train your attention on facial expressions, tone, and context.
“What is this person likely feeling or wanting right now?”
Conversation becomes joint problem‑solving, not performance.
3. Practice as “street skills”
Cashiers, coworkers, DMs, comments sections. Low‑stakes reps.
Each tiny interaction is an empathy experiment, not a test.
Over time, this combo of cognitive empathy and moment‑to‑moment self‑acceptance rewires social situations from “threat zone” into “human puzzle.”
If you want a concrete, learnable path out of social anxiety and into more relaxed, authentic connection, Chapter 7 is built exactly for that.
